Day 4 went well. Even though we are incorporating some additional foods back into our diet, it's become clear to Jamie and me what our stronghold is: sweets! I'm no longer calling it our Daniel fast, since we really aren't following those rules anymore, but we're still fasting. I visited a friend yesterday who is doing the Daniel fast, and she said, "It's hard to spend more time with God right now because I'm always cooking!
Hearing from God has been interesting. I thought most of that would happen during quiet times reading my Bible, but in fact He's speaking most to me by revealing things about myself that I did not realize. When I get angry at God that I can't eat the way I want to, I realize all the things in this life that I treasure over Him. And it's not just food.
I have a vision for different aspects of my family life, but I don't always make decisions that would ever cause that vision to be realized. For instance, I want my children to benefit from having a mom who stays home with them, but do they really if I spend most of the day doing housework and very little time engaging them 1-on-1? I want my children to value experiences and people more than stuff, but how can they when we have so much stuff, and spend so much time taking care of all our stuff...? I realize, in so many ways, that I fall short. I know that's where He desires to bring us, though. He wants us to know that we are nothing apart from Him.
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3 comments:
Ive loved reading your post this week. I admire your strength so much! I decided to take the fast two days a week and even those two days Im struggling, your posts made me feel so much better though. Thank you!
Thank you so much for that! I don't feel like I'm anything to be admired right now, so your post just made my day ;-)
You might feel like you fall short, but you also aren't offering yourself much grace. Your children already DO benefit from one-on-one time with you AND from seeing a strong, capable mother interested in possibly a little work or freelance writing and running her home/caring for her family. I'm pretty sure you need to re-read Proverbs 31 and feel more encouraged by the truth of what is "valuable" that wherever these lies are you are believing.
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