I've been wanting to write a post on Baby Wise for awhile now. In fact, I have a draft saved that I just scrapped. I was having trouble articulating what I wanted to communicate, but I just read my friend Nickie's blog, and she reminds me so much of myself during the early days of implementing Baby Wise.
First, I want to say that we had a lot of success with the Baby Wise principles. Micah goes down awake with little to no fussing. He takes two 1.5 hour naps and sleeps 11-12 hours at night. He's been doing that for months. We are so grateful!
However, it breaks my heart when I hear of moms who want so badly to rock their crying babies to sleep but fear that doing so will create a habit they can never break. I was that mom. Micah has always gone down great at night, but we struggled with naps. Different tips and tricks worked temporarily, but I eventually "caved" and rocked him. I felt like I was failing at Baby Wise at the time; I had visions of rocking my 5-year-old to sleep. But by 8 months, Micah indicated that he no longer wanted/needed to be rocked at nap time, so I started putting him down awake. He transitioned with no problems.
So here's my point: while I embrace many of the principles in Baby Wise, I think in some ways the book encourages independence between mom and baby too soon. Simply put, moms shouldn't feel guilty for wanting to hold, cuddle and rock their babies more than the book thinks is wise.
With the next one, I still plan to establish an eat-awake-sleep routine. I will still do all the tricks to make sure baby gets a full feeding, and I will wake baby up to eat if necessary. I think that alone - keeping Micah from having a long stretch of uninterrupted sleep during the day - helped him distinguish night from day. But I will also rock him/her to sleep if necessary and won't feel guilty about it. Now Micah is mobile and rarely wants to be held, let alone rocked. I miss the days when he would let me rock him, and I realize how quickly those days pass by.
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4 comments:
THANK YOU SO MUCH! That makes me feel alot better! I really appreciate your advice!
oh my goodness. It is so important to rock your kids! Where I work, the kids were never rocked as babies, and now I end up rocking these big, huge 12 year old who just need the soothing, rhythmic, bonding experience of a good rock! you're doing a great job!
I couldn't agree more! We used Baby Wise VERY loosely... the basic principles but not to the full extent at all. It worked great for our kids, but there were many many days that they were rocked to sleep :)
Amen! One way babies mature and develop is through touch. I think Baby Wise has good schedules but there are things in the book I disagreed with, and not holding my baby was one of them! HA!
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